Does he love me or not?

Ok, my bestfriend and I of 10 years got together and moved in as a couple after I left my husband a year ago. Im 25 btw. Well to me its kinda like a fairy tale. The one person I think I have always been in love with and just never realized it till now. My bf is pushes me away for days and wont even hold a good conversation(says he just wants me to go away). Then he is awesome for a few weeks. Its just keeps going on like that. Its a painfull loop but the good times are great. Im not working right now and he is supporting me and I know he isnt too happy about that. I just dont know what to do. I have left him a few times for treating me bad but he calls me crying to get me to come back and 2 days after im home the hate/love circle starts agian. He says he doesnt want to open up to anyone ever agian. He had his heart broken like 4 years ago